All The Kings Men

Humpty Dumpty sat on a wall,
Humpty Dumpty had a great fall.
All the king’s horses and all the king’s men
Couldn’t put Humpty together again.

I sometimes think whoever wrote children’s poem suffered  from major depressive disorder. If not, then I can totally relate to this poem anyway. As a matter of fact, I can associate with a lot of the childhood characters I grew up with.

There is Eeyore, OMG, he was sad all over–and was probably clinically depressed. I felt suicidal just watching poor Eeyore. Seriously, something bad must have happened to Eeyore as a child like he ran off a cliff with a bus full of kids or something.

And then there was Charlie Brown. He was dealt with a heavy dose of real life. Charlie Brown demonstrated the struggle, pain and downright misery of childhood. He never received a Valentine’s card. His dog could not remember his name. He was always picked last for the team. Basically, Charlie Brown is a loser.

And last, there was Olive Oil, Popeye’s girlfriend. she had one of cartoon’s first eating disorders. She was an anorexic. She never even ate Popeye’s spinach (unless forced to when she was completely unconscious due to some villain–like many of us with eating disorders will do)

It is no wonder that so many of us are screwed up. Look at the cartoon characters we grew up with. Adults that were most likely crazy (OK clinically diagnosed) wrote the scripts. And thus predisposed us to what would inevitably become our future. No, I’m not saying the cartoons caused this…just saying that our world in which we lived in…

“All the kings horses…” The Doctors, Psychiatrist, Therapist could not put us back together. We became society’s misfits–living in hell within our soul–tormented constantly.

Gloom and doom. Our vision skewed by our depression glossed glasses.

For even on Eeyore’s happiest day (Birthday) he could not muster up a happy sentiment. For maybe, I am not much different. I always wait for the shoe to drop and if it does not, I will perhaps throw the shoe myself.

If it isn’t enough to worry…I worry about tomorrow when today hasn’t even passed. Old Mother Hubbard was so poor her cupboards were bare. What will I do if tomorrow doesn’t provide? Yes, I worry.

And then there is us alcoholics. Homer Simpson. “Beer” the cause of and solution to life’s problems.” He kids that beer is for daddies and kids with fake IDs.  My husband says the difference between alcoholics and drunks…one goes to meetings. I go to meetings. I am an alcoholic, recovering drug addict.

The Lord says, Worry not. Matthew 6:26 “Look at the birds of the air; they do not sow or reap or store away in barns, yet your heavenly Father feeds them. Are you not much more valuable than they?”

I try to believe… to trust… I even pray about it… Mark 9:24 “…I do believe; but please help my unbelief.”

Today, I stumble, I fall and I wait. For the King—Jesus to put me together again.

me

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