If I should Die Before I Wake

If I should die before I wake I pray my Lord my soul to take”

“Surely you will not die”… Satan’s words slithered off his forked tongue with such ease. Eve believed him. Adam believed him. That day they fell  from grace in the eyes of God. (Gen 3:4)

“Surely you will not die.” One more pill, one more bite of that cake, one more look, one more moment with your lover, just one more…

…but the next day’s pain soon throbbing as the shame began to overtake my soul. So, I hid my nakedness from the sight of God Almighty.

It was always the same, the promise…to never do “it” again. But the hours passed by and I grew weaker. By the afternoon, I had succumbed yet to another powerful round. It is always darkest before dawn and I awakened with grief beyond despair. Cries of anguish like the eerie sound of a wounded animal came deep from within my soul.

I’m fortunate though…My cry was heard.

My friend Jessica’s was not.

She could not crawl out of her deep despair. This powerful disease of addiction was too strong for her. Even though, I found the Hope, she could not see past the pain after the fruit was eaten. “Surely you will die.” She lost all hope. She believed the lie (John 8:44)

But I have already seen a plan for her. He has a plan and a purpose even after she’s gone. (Jer 29:11) All this time, I thought God’s plan had to be while we were living, but it does not. Jessica’s life will have meaning. I will one day share her story but for now, her legacy lives in…

Jessica’s Hope.

Beautifully Awkward

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